Saturday, December 24, 2016

Disappointments of 2016

At first I really wasn't going to do one of these lists this year because with time, money, and Rotten Tomatoes why watch bad movies at all? The future of my blog is uncertain in 2017. I may be revamping a switching to an actual website next year. It'll be written reviews with the intent of video blogs and YouTube channel eventually.

But, I received some constructive criticism the other day that might make me scrap the whole thing. If I am not a member of the press or have connections to get early screeners for movies, I shouldn't give Hollywood my money to continue to produce crappy movies. This person has a point, and it's making me rethink some things.

So this years list is more of a selection of disappointments rather than 'Worst' movies I saw. It's going to be a mixture really. And maybe disappointments are far greater punishment? No, not really.

Top 10 Disappointments of 2016 (10 – 1)

JASON BOURNE

For a good part of the year this movie was between 'Close But No Cigar' and 'Disappointments'. It came down to this and HARDCORE HENRY. I'm not a fan of either, but JASON BOURNE has no excuse for how terrible it is. Shame on the actor and director for laughing all the way to the bank I actually went to see this on a Thursday night with a large group of fans, and NONE of them liked it.

THE BOY

I remember the trailers for this and I couldn't take it seriously. Sorry, but evil dolls just don't do it for me unless they are named Chucky. It wasn't until a recommendation from BirthMoviesDeath that made me wanna check it out.

THE BOY was never going to set the horror world on fire, but I found myself enjoying the movie quite a bit. Then the ending ruined all of that! And I'm not talking about the twist. Toward the end a dumb ex-boyfriend character shows up out of the blue to create drama and suspense that the movie didn't warrant or need. Dumb.

MR. RIGHT

Written by Max Landis and directed by somebody. On paper this movie kinda works but on screen it just keeps getting worse and worse. The only thing that saves this movie are it's two stars, Sam Rockwell and Anna Kendrick. They are both having fun with their characters and salvaging what they can to make MR. RIGHT worth watching. I personally think the director needs to watch more tough guy movies and rely less on goons saying the 'F' word.

HARD TARGET 2

It breaks my heart to have this movie on this list, but HARD TARGET 2 definitely earned it. Not even one of Hollywood's greatest action stars working today saved this movie. I hate that Scott Adkins is in this! His appearance in DOCTOR STRANGE makes up for it.

HARD TARGET 2 reminded me of those terrible Rambo knock-offs from the late 80's and early 90's. The good old days of when two mounted machine guns on a motorcycle is better than one! Cool!!!!

THE BROTHERS GRIMSBY

Comedies really shouldn't be on lists like these, because what I find unfunny someone else will think it's hilarious. Too much of what this film was going for punch line wise I just didn't care for. But we call agree the movie is probably better than FIFTY SHADES OF BLACK.

HOW TO BE SINGLE

Again, comedies really shouldn't be on the list but this movie was a chore. Rebel Wilson is amazing but here she kinda got on my nerves. And Dakota Johnson has ZERO star power whatsoever!

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES

Not crazy enough and not rated R. A PG-13 zombie movie when there is a popular television show that's more graphic than most horror films? Get real.

THE FOREST

Jump scare, dream. Jump scare, dream. Wash and repeat.

INDEPENDENCE DAY RESURGENCE

If this is one of the worst or most disappointing movies I've seen this year then I'm probably doing pretty good. I lay it all out in my review, check it out. But it's worth repeating that the studio messed up big time by not showing up to Will Smith's house with a dump truck of cash!

CROUCHING TIGER HIDDEN DRAGON: SWORD OF DESTINY

Awe yeah! Martial arts and wu shu action from the director of IRON MONKEY and action choreographer of THE MATRIX! What could go wrong? Everything apparently. Probably not the worst film of 2016, but it sure pissed me off!

Thanks for reading! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

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